A Reflection from a Funeral

Last month, I attended a funeral for the mother of an old friend. It was sad, people cried, but the chapel was packed. I honestly did not know my friend’s mother very well, but I wish that I had. She was a stand up person. Basically the exact type of woman Solomon talks about in Proverbs 31. Part of the eulogy for the funeral was from something this mother had written in her youngest daughter’s diary. The short version of what she said to her daughter was this: You know that you are truly following God’s will when you are able to give up all of yourself to God. It is when you are always thinking of others before yourself. It is when you take joy and pride in the successes of your friends and others around you even when you yourself may be suffering. It is also when you joyfully are willing to work in the background without a chance or the expectation of recognition. Lastly, she wrote that you know that you are in the center of God’s will when you do good deeds and all of those around you call them evil.

What amazed me most about this story was that it was focused on our attitudes rather than what we did or our abilities. This is what made her a successful Christian who was able to impact not only the lives of her husband and four children, but the lives of all of the people attending her funeral. The picture of this funeral was one of a chapel packed to the point of not only standing room only, but of people standing in the lobby because they could not get any closer to the event inside. What a life and how sad that I did not know my friend’s mother in a closer sense.

There is a profound issue in this that we desperately need to pay attention to as members of this scene. Are our attitudes really in line with the ones God would want us to have? Are we really in this scene to serve for God’s glory or our own glory? Are our attitudes the ones that will help perpetuate growth or hinder it? If we are going to make this Christian dance scene last another ten years and if we are doing this for some greater purpose, we need to start following the advice my friends mother passed on in that diary.

I think if we really break down the possible answers to those questions we will really have three main groups of people. In fact, we may have a little of each group in us. The first group is made of people who know without a doubt that they do have the right attitude. These are the people who are usually the ones who arrive at the event set-up first and are the last to leave during the clean-up. These are the ones who will be just as happy headlining an event as taking money at the door or taking out the trash. These are also the people who will talk to the kid that just hangs out in the corner alone. The second group is made from people who doubt if they are in God’s will. These are the ones who do everything right and more often than not have the right attitude, but simply doubt their motives and deeds for whatever reason. The last group is made from the people who think they are doing God’s will and think that they have the right attitude and yet refuse to do anything but headline an event or other jobs in which they think they are the only ones who can get it right.

If you truly are in the first group, then I hope that this article simply reassures you regarding your attitude. For the second group, I pray that this article will help you to find peace regarding your attitude and God’s will. I understand how hard it can seem to both not know what God’s will is for your life and how difficult it is to become confident in it once you do find it. For the third group, I hope that you read this article and reevaluate your reasons for contributing to the Christian dance scene. This is important because your attitude could mean the difference between someone accepting Jesus or rejecting him forever. Even if you feel that you do not need to preach to the dance scene, your attitude is a direct reflection of who Jesus is and that will affect that person’s life.

We have all heard it from time to time. It is not what we do; it is how we do it that makes a difference. An example of this is a Mag-Lite Flashlight. You know Mag-Lites are the best. Everyone does. When you think of flashlights, a Mag-Lite will sell itself. Our attitudes about serving in the Christian dance scene are no different. The ultimate goal of our involvement in this scene should not simply be to have fun, but to make some sort of an impact. Sure, you do not need a reason to party, but partying should not be your reason to live. The best way to live is in a manner that will impact lives. That impact can be anything from developing a friendship in which someone learns to trust you with some of their most private thoughts to helping someone to find and develop a lasting relationship with Jesus Christ. This is not going to happen if our attitudes are wrong.

Biblical Attitudes

The Bible is filled with people who learned to put aside their attitude and doubts and handed their lives over fully to God so they could impact the lives of others. Ruth, David, Ester, Noah, Hannah, Daniel, Samuel and many others come to mind. Their situations and sacrifices were all different and none of them were perfect, yet they allowed God to work through them so that He could affect the lives of others. They were not perfect, but their willingness to serve God in whatever role he had for them outweighed the times when they did not exhibit this willing attitude.

The Bible also has several good examples of bad attitudes as well. The best example has got to be Jonah. Here is a man who was given a clear purpose and job to do by God. He did not like what it was because he would have to convince a group of people that he hated to change the way they were living or face God’s wrath. Jonah ran from this task. His presence brought trouble upon those around him until finally he was cast over the side of a ship he had been traveling on and eventually ended up right where he did not want to be: the city of Nineveh. Grudgingly, Jonah confronted the people there who he hated and pleaded with them to change their ways. After he had done his job, he left the city, found a nice view of the city and sat down waiting for God to destroy it. Jonah’s attitude was all wrong. He wanted to see these people die. He did not want to do this job that God had given him and he was determined to make sure it failed. As he waited there, God allowed a plant to grow and give him some shade. In the city however, despite Jonah’s attitude, the people changed their ways and God spared them.

The moral of this is that while it is true that Jonah did eventually do what God wanted him to do and God’s will and purpose for his life was fulfilled, Jonah missed out on a huge blessing in his life. He had the opportunity to serve willingly. He could have spared himself the suffering that is often brought on when we decide to do things our way rather than God’s. He also missed out on the joy of seeing God’s work fulfilled in the lives of those who truly needed it. He also probably was not very effective on his own either as he grudgingly performed his work. It probably was a lot harder than it would have been otherwise if he had simply had the right attitude in the first place.

For us, this is an example of how we can be trying to do God’s work and be focused on the wrong benefits of it. Jonah eventually did the work for two reasons. First, God would not let him out of it. Second, he thought there was no way that these people would change their ways and God would destroy them rather than redeem them. Sometimes, that is exactly how we are in this scene. We try to get that record contract so we can make money and buy new gear while God wants us to have it so we can reach others better. We might try to be the best DJ so that we can get gigs with the cool DJs in the big clubs while God wants to get us in the big clubs so that we can minister to the needs of the DJs and patrons of those clubs. Our focus can often times be on ourselves and what we want to happen rather than God and what He wants to happen. Sometimes we are so unwilling to do the mundane tasks but we always jump at the chance to do anything that gets us in the spotlight. That is not the attitude of Jesus, who despite being the King of the Universe still has the time to wash the feet of his followers.

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.” Those were Paul’s words in his letter to the Galatians. We should not be focused on building up ourselves, but others. That goes for our fellow Christians in this scene and those who not. There is no room for jealousy or petty competition among us. Rivalries will not help us to win the race when we are in realty dependant upon each other.

It’s all About Humility

All of this is about humility. We need to humble ourselves and be willing to listen to each other’s problems and to realize that not everyone is on the same level spiritually and learn to handle each other gently. Our attitudes will cause this scene to fall apart if we do not keep them in check. We should be just as willing to clean toilets as we are to take the prime DJ slot at our events. I know that I am not always the best example of this, but it is something I am working on to correct.

This attitude of humility really is a total emptying of oneself; the removal of our own thoughts and desires and the replacement of them by God’s own thoughts and desires. If we do not have this, then we will never truly find His will in our lives. Our humility will effect the planning of our events, how we raise up new talent, and even how we conduct the business end of our scene. Humility is the thing that allows us to take out the trash at a party and be joyful about it. It is humility that says you do not care who someone is, they are just as important to you as your best friend. Humility is a difficult attitude to develop, but it is one that we need to strive for because it may be the biggest difference between our Christian dance scene and the secular one.

Let me leave you with the words of Paul from Colossians 3:12-14 as a final parting thought.

Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity.